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Hello world, Vicky Pollard here. I am going to start speaking and when I speak, I do not want to hear anyone of you miserable souls talk or you will get beatins.

Though, I dont know nuffing or nuffing about what I've been doin but SHUTUP! Who mentioned Trish? Trish trish!
Shut up! My day went something like this or rather, the past few days went sumthin or nuthin like this :

Ann wanted to meet me, so I was like, yeah ok, lets meet, lets go give someone some beatins. I told her I would be at the doctors first, so she said ok, so we met at the docs. Cept, she was at the wrong docs and asked me "Vicky Fucking Fat Pollard, where the Hell are you!?!".
So I went "You bloody blind bitch of a bat, I'm at Sterlin Clinic, the one opposite Mr Lim Chan Seng What the hell is that name clinic."
She slamed down the phone and found me and I was like, Omg, You bitch, lets go get some cheese fries. So we got some cheese fries and bubble tea. Both of which made us feel like fatty fatty bom boms. For fear of having to join Fat Fighters, we had to gym off the calories. She taught me kick boxing and was like SOOOOOO totally rude and went "Kick punch punch box. C'mon fat slut. Don't you want to burn off them cellulites! Or would you rather remain fat forever?!"
I was like, OMG SHUT UP!!
So I shoved his gorilla body into the pool which floated, like some sorta oil spot and we started swimmin!

Anyway, to cut to the chase, we drank with Jacqueline and Dolly. Everyone stayed over and we had a blast, even though we put back all the weight we loss that day.

I have been Trying to brush up my photoshop techniques for the past few days. And have basically been going out.
Had steam boat at Cheez's place today.

And sometimes, I look at her and go Wow, how did this last?
You are my super amazing gal to the Pal!
One million hearts to my million trillion dollar girl.

Valentines day is tomorrow and I plan to spend it at NYJC.
Goodbye

Xoxo
Vicky Pollard from Little Britain