How many bruises can you take to prove that you're strong?

My ego's been bruised today, yet again, what's new.
I did horribly for my prelims.
I want to kill myself.
Maybe it's Gods warning to get me to study.
I still don't understand how I'm suppose to be thankful for that many points I received today and praise the lord about it. It's so fucking high, it's humiliating and its fucking bullshit.
My lit, SS, Chem, ART(!!!) papers are sso disgusting.
This is not considering my Elect Geog and Math.
I didn't study for math so maybe I'm immune to failing.

What are expectations when you can't meet them. Mine weren't realistic.
If I'm suppose to "half" my prelim points to get my Os, then just kill me.
This new art teacher, who's pretty young told me that I'd get an A2 for my O levels indirectly. SometimesIjustwishthatpeoplewouldjustkeeptheirfuckingcommentstothemselves.
HonestlywhatcanIdonowright, ifyouwanttosaysuchathingthenyoushouldvetoldmeearlierorelseShutup.

Since Plan A of studying a week before prelims did not really work out that well.
I'm going to plan B.
That is, no more Lido outings with friends to find her.
No more internet or tv.
Good bye social life.
Today's suppose to be the day I relax but I'm too worried to relax.
I don't know why I bother myself with other people's blogs who don't even know that I exsist, I am a loser. b o o.
I must, I just must get rid of that bad habit.
So what if youve a million friends? You're still stupid.
I don't want to fall in that category.

This is it, I start now or I'll fail.
Which do you choose?
I choose now.



Fuck you plan A, you suck.
And thanks a lot for my grades, God.