Life needs to be sorted out

I am stopping all my addictions at one go and hopefully not going to form any new ones as I go cold turkey. They are taking a toll on me, particularly smoking. It is so bad for health and I am glad that all my friends from both outside and in JC have decided to stop at the same time too!
My school friends have their sports season. I'm sorry but I'm really against sports and I really don't see the point in winning a trophy unless you're thinking of being some sorta sports coach or sports person next time.
Unlike joining competitions, such as writing competitions or art, this isn't going to be in your portfolio because 1) it's team effort unless you are captain or vice captain or have some sort of role, there really is no point in burning so much time unless you really really enjoy it.
Which I guess they do?
I guess I'll never understand how one can be so patriotic towards school.
I find playing sports outside school, joining some sort of club is more prestigious. Schools playing amongst other schools? The next year when you've graduated, no one is going to remember that you brought the school glory. I can partly understand group effort and self satisfaction in claiming some sort of title and achieving something for the school... I was in my secondary's school SYF. I liked it a lot and worked really hard because I loved the play.
Not so much into bringing glory to the school or any fuck shit.
More like enjoying the times.
But you see, drama is way more enjoyable. You get to talk and socialise with your friends, talk to the cool drama teachers ( in secondary school only). Is it the same satisfaction one gets in running 12km non-stop and feeling an asthma attack coming?

I had dinner at my sisters place today and have never in my life met so many french men at one area. I generalise french men as sleezy but they weren't sleezy because one of them was a homosexual and if anything, the asian guy - not victor- was the most sleezy. And anyway, this asian guy asked me if I did sports after I declared that I am a lesbian whcih I then corrected and said bisexual.
Seriously.. Do I look like I do sports...
You know, some people might take that offensively. Imagine someone going up to Huahua and saying " Are you in canoe?"

HAHAHAHA

BTW Hua, if you're reading this, you really should get your NS shit sorted out. I talked to Vic about it and he said you'll regret it if you don't get it sorted out.

I am afraid of declaring anything right now, I am afraid of saying that I am okay. Because I am afraid I will disappoint myself. But for now, I am taking my first gigantic step to get my life sorted out without the help of nicotine, alcohol ( that I won't say I am addicted to but I can use it as a substitute for the former, thus I must stay away from it) and cutting.