There's a bug on my computer screen

It has been sitting there - somewhere around the "labels" bar while I'm typing this blogpost- for about 4 minutes counting. I guess, it must be pretty comfortable. The blaring white-omg it is crawling. It's now on my blogpost. No no, now it is somewhere around my tabs, no no it's not on the screen now. Wanted to say how it must be comfortable, sleeping on the warm computer screen.

Omg, so I was doing my GP AQ, which I fucking suck at. ( I tend to go on and on about stupid rubbish and then I'd feel so bad about deleting it that I'd just leave it there and get one mark. T_T) ANYWAY! I was doing my GP AQ when I suddenly thought about my ambition.
A lot of people have asked me what I want to be in life.
I like to ask people the same. It is always interesting to know about people's ambitions and picturing them in a business suit. Or a friend living in a crappy apartment with nothing but a cup of coffee, a box full of cigarettes, a shelf of cameras, a Macbook and a shelf full of cameras. I've a thing for people who know what they want to do in life. Or people who are really good at something. Like really really good.
A lot of people have asked if I was going to be an artist.
I thought about it, I think art really motivates me. You know, school really motivates me to do art.
Perhaps now, it is no longer a hobby. Because it is school's timed assignment that really make me sit down and draw. If not, I usually won't have the discipline to draw.
I've always wanted to portray Tofu and chocolate girl and well.. as cruel as Prof Umbridge can get, she allowed us to do whatever topics we want. I chose passion and I finally sketched out Chocolate and tofu Grrs. Their relationship and their wild passion for each other.
I guess, I'll consider art as a career. But not as like a painter or anything like that. Probably something to do with advertising ( Maybe.. Because I quite like the whole idea of marketing), or animation ( But I really need to prove that I'm good) or some rubbish that society will come up with when I turn 25.
I don't want to be a poor artist. I also don't want to be an artist who is so serious. I've realised that every single O level painting has some sorta social message. Sometimes, it pisses me off. I don't know, it is almost like they want their painting to mean something so they just anyhow whack some idea out. I did that for my Os, I don't regret doing it but I don't feel like the painting is Personal at ALL. I can understand if someone did a painting on breast cancer, for example, if that person has breast cancer or if the person knows someone with breast cancer.
But I don't understand people who paint to convey social messages that they've no relation to.
Why so serious?
I think you can tell when the artist really means it. After all, if the artist really wants to get some sorta message across and is sooo passionate about it, the artist would produce a piece that'd move the audience and himself. But usually, I'm not moved by these pieces. Maybe it is just me.
I don't know, I usually save my passionate social msgs to conversation. Unless I really really want to paint it. But then again, maybe I don't really have a social message to convey in the first place. Maybe I'm not that passionate.
No, I think I'm just passionate about people and feelings. Feelings especially. I remembered looking at Ethel's O level piece in sec 4 and wanting to cry. Her piece was moving. It was almost like you could see the sadness in the kids eyes.
I only get passionate when it comes to feelings.
I know, social messages are also about feelings but sometimes, I think that after doing ones prep boards, you'd lose the feeling. Because LOGICALLY, the painting should show this and this and this, to convey This message.
It's just like saying that your mom is caring.
But is it different when you portray your mom sleeping on the couch while waiting for your sister to get home.
I dont know, I really like it when people talk about the little things. When they observe the little things. I think the little things are the ones that say the most.
I mean, what for show your mom holding a baby right? It is so straightforward. It makes your mom "caringness" seem so typical, so "she is suppose to do that anyway". Doesn't make it unique, it doesn't show why she is different.
It doesn't do anyone justice.
Ok what a lousy example. But hopefully you get what I mean.
Maybe I find it difficult to portray social messages through my art, that's why I leave it to conversation. Or maybe it is because I want to see what the other person think of it. Or maybe it is easier to convey people with words.
I don't know.

WELL BESIDES ART.
I'm gonna get Tanya to teach me how stocks work.
When she becomes a stock brooker of some sort, Imma buy and sell some stocks with her.
Because I'm going to save up enough money to buy good stocks.
STOCKS THAT WON'T SCREW ME OVER!!!
I know people who play stocks at home, who live the shiok lifestyle and who are rich.
I think it is important to be rich.
I like money because it makes things easier. Slightly at least.
It is like how I would pay $1 to stop the argument about who should pay GST. ( not that it has happened).
But you know, it jsut makes life so much easier.
And I don't mean that money means happiness.
What I mean is that, money usually lets things go your way.
That is important to me.

Anyway, enough I'M GETTING BACK TO MY FUCKING GP AQ WHICH IS KILLING MEEEEEE.
then I'm going to sleep in the living room.
You know, I'm in the middle of reading the curious incident of the dog in the night-time by Mark Haddon. I found the book under my table today, it was covered with 1cm layer of dust. I beat the dust off and read it. Was almost late for class because of that book. It is really good and after reading about 50 pages of it, I've realised how stupid I was while dealing with that gigantic autistic boy at Pathlight. You know, the boy who kept scratching his balls.
Hahhaa, I remember how we were suppose to help them with the powerpoint slides on the project " Why I love my school". Denise had to take care of this boy who only wanted to do on "Why I hate my school".

Denise: So what background colour you want?
That boy: Black. I want everything black because it is my favourite colour.

If I'm not wrong he even made the font black so nothing was visible. I think Denise changed it for him in the end.

And there was another kid, that youtubed Porn. And kept rewinding the scene where the lady takes off her shirt. I can't imagine how confused those kids were.
It is hard enough to understand emotions and what more with raging hormones right.
It is not that, that book had taught me how to handle autistic kids or anything. But it brought me into their minds, his mind, Christopher. And there is some sorta understanding. They should've made us read something like that before letting us handle them. All they did was tell us " Oh they're different. Don't really understand emotions. Must be patient" You know, the typical rubbish. I mean we know that they don't really understand emotions but they didn't show us how it is like to be them, so we don't exactly know what level of EQ they are on. Everything was probably more of a shock and going with what the world has taught us. That is to be mean. But yah lah, always the same excuse " No time. Limited resources. "
seriously.. AH YOI?!

OMG i'm ranting like a mad shit, im going off now.