F1 (Fucking sucks)

After waitressing for 7 hours today.
I've come to a conclusion I can never ever do work that I don't enjoy.
I wanted to throw the plates on the ground and just leave.
It was the most miserable I've felt, even I'd rather shit 3 hot devils outta my asshole than to be put through that shit again.
Initially, I was situated at the Stumps, which is this really cool Bar area, that has a balcony which overlooks the road. So you can see the race while drinking your beer.

The noise, the vibe, the international crowd felt really good. It felt like I wasn't in Singapore, seriously. I'm in serious need of a vacation with my friends only, Yeah that was the second thing I realised today. The only reason why I want to go back to that event again and me being not much of a car fanatic is so that I can escape from freaking Singapore. Seriously, if I could, I'd go to countries, Berlin, Amsterdam, Melbourne and Thailand. Another thing I realised, I'm in serious need for flirting and really have to do something about this energy that wants to explode in me. It will kill me if I don't do anything about it.

I left 3 hours earlier than the rest, my phone battery went dead and the only person that came to mind was C. So I called her to ask her to get her arse down to F1 cause I had an extra fucking free pass okay. Anyway, she didn't because she had a wedding to attend to.
I was a little pissed that I had like a free pass to this awesome event ( which I hate if I had to work again. People should be serving me, not me to them ( I think that was what made the whole experience more frustrating) ), I had no phone and no one to call.
So I eyed a handsome old fella sitting across me on the padang field. He looked back with a beer in his hand. He was alone and I thought about it for a while, after giving him a quick glance again, I got up and took a long walk to the ATM.
Anyway, There was not a single stall in that place which sells fags. What the hell.
(Not that I smoke, of course.)

Anyway, I've an art exam on monday and I don't know if I want to go for the F1 zouk crazy party thing. I was quite excited over the idea of it on my way home in the train. But then, now that I'm home in my PJS, in the cold and being more rational, I think I need my sleep ( prolly becos I'm also tired now) for the art exam.
I dunno la, knn. Anyway, if I want anything not-singaporean, I can just hang out with my sister.

So I've a free pass to F1 tomorrow, you want? It's a workers pass, so you can go into the kitchen and stuff to cook up shit. HAHAHA.

This Always freaking happens you know. Everytime I think TOO much about something, it'll never happen. And I know why it doesn't, because the more you think about it happening, the more it really happens, the more anxious you get, hoping that it'll follow whatever freaking ideal you have in your mind. So in the end, the stuff that I imagine always disappoint me badly either that or it never happens ( which'll disappoint me too).

Yeah, so Friday was a celebration. We; Asy, Mirah, Ilona, Jo, Robson, Shaun and I went to drink at some nearby playground, that was really spooky. I had been waiting to get that high for the past 3 weeks. I understand why Winston from 1984 drinks gin all the time, because it makes reality seem happier. Uh, I don't regret the things I've done but the thought of me being so freaking touchy and flashing my bra to Mirah, was really weird. I still feel quite embarrassed about it. Anyway, Shaun, Jo, Mirah and Rob stayed over.
But I loved friday night, because everyone said things that were honest and So sincere. It's the kind of good things that you notice about a person but you never say. Because it'd be weird to say too nice things on a normal day.
So anyway, Robson slept beside Shaun ( I had to say that, Ha-ha)
At one point, Shaun called me his bolster while Robson took the rest of the bed up.
I remembered the smell of my pist, that smelt of beer of the worse kind. Like some sort of dehydrated fool.

Anyway, i dunno what to do tomorrow. Feel like just giving it to my sister. Might just end up doing that.